Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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