am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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