the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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