Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!