so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Randomize
