I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Randomize
