all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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