I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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