i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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