Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
