Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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