It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Randomize