NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
