He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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