All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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