I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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