Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.