My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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