People with herpes should wear stickers.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
