idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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