Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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