I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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