That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Randomize
