My friends, they love my intelligence
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
