I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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