so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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