Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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