i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Welp...herpes.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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