we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize