i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
