my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
