dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
