Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
FUCK WHALES
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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