508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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