Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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