how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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