you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
