dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
