Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
