I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
