You're so nebulous sometimes
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
