Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
