1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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