My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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