That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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