um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Actions speak louder than pants.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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