ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize
