it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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