i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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