But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
