Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
