I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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